How do we put on tender mercies (Colossians 3:12)?

The apostle Paul encouraged the Colossians to embrace a holy lifestyle with wholehearted enthusiasm and commitment: “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection” (Colossians 3:12–14, NKJV).

Paul used the Greek verb endysasthe, translated as “put on” in Colossians 3:12. It means “to be or become endowed with a quality or condition” and is understood as “being wrapped in a cover, dressed, or invested with clothing.” In the New Living Translation, verse 12 reads, “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”

“Tender mercies” (oiktirmou in Greek) refers to a deep, heartfelt awareness of and sympathy for those suffering and in need. In the New International Version, Colossians 3:12 states, “Clothe yourselves with compassion.” Tender mercy or “compassion” is central to God’s love for humankind (see Psalm 103:8, 3–14; 145:8–9; Isaiah 49:15–16; Nehemiah 9:17). Because of His great love, God saw our need for salvation and sent Jesus to rescue us from sin and death (John 3:16–17; 1 John 4:9–10; Ephesians 2:4–5). We were undeserving sinners who benefitted from God’s mercy, grace, and love. He lavishly poured out His tender mercies on us; therefore, we must offer others the same kindness, forgiveness, and love.

Paul teaches us as believers “to put off [our] old self, which belongs to [our] former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of [our] minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22–24, ESV; see also Romans 13:12–14; Colossians 3:5–10).

Our old sinful attitudes and behaviors were crucified with Christ (Romans 6:6; Galatians 2:20; 5:24). Therefore, we no longer wear the old clothing of our flesh but instead throw it off and put on the characteristic apparel that fits our new life in Christ (see Colossians 3:10; 2 Corinthians 3:18; Romans 8:29). As we go through the process of sanctification, our behavioral wardrobe transforms little by little into the image of Jesus Christ.

To put on tender mercies means cultivating a heart of compassion, grace, and kindness. We become imitators of God and Christ in showing mercy, sympathy, humility, meekness, patience, forgiveness, and love (see Philippians 2:1–8; Ephesians 2:7; 4:32; 5:1–2; Titus 3:4). Our new life involves actively seeking opportunities to show empathy and understanding, particularly to those in need. It requires us to be sensitive to the struggles and feelings of those around us, offering support and comfort in times of distress.

Humility is essential to putting on tender mercies, as demonstrated by Christ. We must recognize our limitations and value others’ contributions (Romans 12:3, 10, 16; Philippians 2:3–4; Ephesians 5:21). By embracing humility, we foster a spirit of cooperation, community, and mutual respect.

Having patience also plays a crucial role in clothing ourselves with tender mercies (see 1 Corinthians 13:4). Patience allows us to endure challenges and setbacks with grace, maintaining a calm and peace-loving demeanor even with difficult people and situations (see Proverbs 15:18; Galatians 5:22–23; 1 Timothy 1:16; James 1:2–4).

Forgiveness lies at the bedrock of the holy life God has called us to embrace. We are to forgive others just as our heavenly Father has forgiven us (see Matthew 5:7; 6:12, 14–15; Matthew 18:21–35; Luke 6:37; 2 Corinthians 2:7–8). We put on tender mercies when we let go of grudges, hurts, and resentments and extend grace to those who have wronged us. By practicing forgiveness, we bridge the gap caused by hurt and build pathways to healing and reconciliation.

Finally, love binds all these virtues together (see Colossians 3:14; Ephesians 5:2). Genuine care and concern for others will motivate us to act with compassion, humility, patience, and forgiveness, creating a harmonious and nurturing family of God.

In response to God’s great mercy, followers of Jesus put on tender mercies by serving others, listening to a friend, helping a neighbor, comforting someone in her loss, forgiving an enemy, or simply being kind to strangers. By consciously choosing to behave with tenderness and compassion, we reflect the love of God in Christ to those who need it most.