What does “let them ask their own husbands at home” mean (1 Corinthians 14:35)?

The church in Corinth had a multitude of problems, and the apostle Paul wrote them an epistle to correct the problems and answer their questions. In a lengthy section on proper order in the church service and the use of spiritual gifts, Paul addresses the behavior of women during the service: “If there is anything they desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in church” (1 Corinthians 14:35, ESV).

Some people misconstrue this verse to mean that a woman must “sit down and shut up” in church, especially when taken with the verse immediately preceding it: “Women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission, as the law says” (1 Corinthians 14:34). Paul gives a similar instruction in 1 Timothy 2:11–12: “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. . . . She must be quiet.”

But keeping women in absolute silence cannot be Paul’s intent. Earlier in the same epistle of 1 Corinthians, Paul wrote of the “woman who prays or prophesies” in church (1 Corinthians 11:5). So, to interpret chapter 14 correctly, we need to answer these questions:

In what context are women “not allowed to speak”? The social context is a worship service in church attended by both men and women. The broader theme of the passage is order during the church service. Doing things “in a fitting and orderly way” (1 Corinthians 14:40) is important, “for God is not a God of disorder but of peace” (1 Corinthians 14:33).

In 1 Corinthians 14, Paul compares two gifts of the Spirit: speaking in tongues and prophesying. Prophecy is more desirable in the church for several reasons: everyone can understand prophecy, whereas tongues require an interpreter (verses 5, 13, 28). Prophecy instructs and edifies the whole church (verses 3–4). Also, prophecy was given for the church, but tongues were given as a sign to unbelievers (verses 21–22).

Paul then gives strict guidelines on the use of tongues in the church. Speaking prophecy also has parameters: In a church service, “you can all prophesy in turn” (1 Corinthians 14:31), but only “two or three prophets should speak, and the others should weigh carefully what is said” (1 Corinthians 14:29). This is the immediate context of Paul’s instructions concerning women in the church. So, when he says, “Women should remain silent,” judging the prophecies is obviously included in the prohibition. Tongues-speaking might also be included.

What is “the law” Paul has in mind? The mention of “the law” here is a reference to the whole of the Old Testament. Since the subject at hand was how a woman “must be in submission” (1 Corinthians 14:34), the passage Paul most likely has in mind is Genesis 3:16. There, God placed Eve under the authority of her husband.

What does a woman asking questions have to do with not being “in submission”? The issue is not asking questions, per se, or having a desire to learn but interrupting a public speaker with questions. For women to speak out in public—especially to interrupt a sermon—would promote disorderliness and ignore God’s established chain of command. Such bold public behavior is indecorous or “disgraceful” (1 Corinthians 14:35), the opposite of being in submission.

Why is it better for a wife to ask her husband at home rather than at church? At home, a husband and wife can converse freely, and she can ask all the questions she wants about matters brought up at church. The husband, as the spiritual head of the wife (see Ephesians 5:23), is to lead her into spiritual truth.

What precise behavior is Paul wanting to curtail? During a church service with men present, women are restricted from evaluating prophecies, as such activity involves public teaching (see 2 Timothy 2:12). If no men are present, the rule would not apply. Also, women are not to disrupt the service by interrupting the men who are speaking, even if they have legitimate questions. Those questions should be directed to their husbands at home.